May 27, 2010

Goodnight, Chair


Every morning when Mr. Warden arrives, he goes to his locker and unpacks his 'office'. This is quite hysterical to watch because Mr.Warden really takes this job of his very seriously. First,he drags his desk away from the wall and unfolds his tablecloth which he drapes over the desk.(the one with the loud yellow and orange print) He carefully retrieves several knicknacks/statues from his locker and strategically places them, one by one, in the same position that they were in on the day before. After his pen holder, statues, notebooks and giant wall clock(which should be on the wall) are all placed on his desk, he places a giant wooden statue of a black panther showing its teeth on top of his locker. Intimidation tactic ?? Possibly. On the walls he's got a tacky black velvet painting and a pair of canvases with matching lilies. The final touch is the giant scroll of the 'Serenity Prayer' that he unrolls and hangs over the fire extinguisher. I thought that hanging things over the fire extinguisher is a fire hazard...no? and umm, religion in Public School??...That's two violations in one. Well, I'd overlook the Serenity Prayer if only he lived by it. Mr.Warden steps back to admire his 'handiwork'. How proud Mr. Warden is of his office in the hallway!
Last but not least, are the Office chairs. He keeps one chair on the right for his personal office 'meetings' with the School Custodian and two chairs on the left for ??? (Beats me). I think he uses these chairs to define his invisible office boundaries. No one is allowed to sit on these chairs without Mr. Warden's permission! Do not even try sitting on one to tie your shoe! These chairs have great meaning to Mr. Warden. Such great meaning in fact that when he leaves everyday he turns the chairs around to face the wall to insure that no one will sit on them in his absence. He believes that turning them to the wall will deter the teachers from sitting on them. These chairs are off limits! Mr. Warden does not want anyone sitting on his chairs, especially when he's not around! Don't even think of sitting there. If you dare to move them, Mr. Custodian will report you to the authorities!!

1 comment:

Pissedoffteacher said...

Mr. Warden is lucky I am not one of his inmates.

And, teachers get the reputation of being the crazy ones here. How sad!